Thursday, January 12, 2012

Bird's the word is my attempt at catching up...what put me so far behind? You know how I like everything in order, and I wanted to get this blog post done so I could then blog about everything else that's all started a couple months ago (first week of October to be exact) when I came home from a walk. I walked in the downstairs bathroom and heard a noise. It sounded like it was coming from behind me (laundry room) or above me (our bedroom/bathroom). I got really freaked out after I walked in the laundry room and clearly heard it above me. I grabbed a long screwdriver and my phone. I called Carleton's office and told him I thought someone was in the house. You see, I always, ALWAYS lock the door but my key was in my car in the garage and I didn't want to walk through the house with my tennis shoes on, so against my better judgment thought, it's only 45 minutes and we live across the street from a sheriff. Ok so back to the phone call...Carleton asked where I was, I told him I was outside with a screwdriver, he told me to go back inside to see if anyone was there. I made sure he knew our address (a week earlier when we bought our car he wrote down the wrong address, I thought that's all I need... him calling 911 them coming to find "nothing wrong" because they're at the wrong house!) I walked inside and was quietly going up the stairs. Carleton kept asking if I was still there, I said yes but I'm trying to be quiet, he told me to do the opposite so I said in the bravest loud voice I could muster, "Hello, is anyone there?" ... no answer (phew!)

I proceed to go in my bedroom and look around, nothing. I switch the screwdriver for my gun and look around the rest of the upstairs...bathrooms (yanking back shower curtains), walk-in closets, under all the beds, nothing. I thought, perhaps the perp went downstairs while I was outside talking to Carleton, so I checked the whole downstairs again. When I went in the laundry room I heard more walking around, at this point I thought it was either an animal or a really loud and therefore stupid criminal. I went upstairs again and looked behind all my big dresses, nada.

After returning the gun to it's rightful place I went in the laundry room, this time I heard the noise between the laundry room and bathroom walls. Figuring it must be an animal I decide to get ready and leave, I jump in the shower (still cautious) and get ready. Right before I leave I go in one last time. The walking critter is now in our dryer hose. I called Carleton to give him the latest, he said to tap the hose to see if it would go back out the way it came. After listening to me knock it with my foot he said, "not too hard, the hose could come off". Not wanting a squirrel or anything else crawling up my pants, I decided to shut the door and leave right then.

That night Carleton detached the hose and set a trap:

dryer boxw

He tucked a mat under the door before we went to dinner, just in case:


His hope was it would crawl out, fall in the box and not be able to crawl back out. Good idea, right?

All night we kept knocking on the dryer and checking the box, no sounds, no critter. This was Thursday. Friday morning Carleton checked and saw a box and laundry room floor with poop on them plus boxes and things moved around, but no critter. I asked him to look one last time before he went to work. He opens the door to find something fluttering in his face. He said, "WHOOOAAA" and quickly shut the door, "well that explains a lot". He then located a box to catch this bird. I wish I would've recorded it, it was the funniest thing I've heard in a very long time. He started off saying things like, "hey we're all on the same team" to "I'm not trying to hurt you! If I wanted you dead I would've eaten you by now!" to "We're all friends here, we want the same thing" to "Get in the box you stupid bird!" It was HILARIOUS!

He caught it, he actually caught it with a box!


Time for the release:




Thanks, honey have a good day at work!

The next day, Saturday, I was washing and waxing the cars while he was taking the dryer hook-ups off so we could clean them, and he could clean out the back of the dryer. A few hours later, we were done, all was clean and we decided to rent a movie to watch that night. I washed a load of clothes on an hour and 27 minute cycle, shut the door and sat down for the movie. With about two minutes remaining Carleton says, water's leaking. I said how do you know? C: I can hear it.

We both run to the laundry room to find inches of water all over the place. 4 bath towels, several dish towels, 2 mops, 2 fans, and a LOT of ringing out later (over 2 hours) we had gotten most of the water up. Somehow the washing machine hose came off while our guest was visiting. I HATE that bird.

Then, a couple weeks later, guess what. It happened again. Carleton went under the house to see how on earth critters were getting inside. We thought it might be a mouse this time, but there was no way it could've come up through the crawl space. Two days later we find the exact same type of bird (probably the exact same one) in our dryer. This time I recorded Carleton from outside the door, it wasn't nearly as funny, not even a little bit. He didn't bother with the box shenanigans this time, he just used some gardening gloves. One new dryer hose and a lot of cleaned out seeds and bird poop later, our dryer was put back together and our house bird free.


The week of Thanksgiving it actually happened again. (SERIOUSLY?!) Hence the picture I put up on Thanksgiving:


I'm happy to report since Thanksgiving we've had no more visitors (knock on wood).